The Returner

Chapter 179: If it’s a Dark Wizard, then eradication is in order! (4)

A ‘priest’.

A ‘cleric’.

There might have been many variations, but still, they all meant the same thing – people who channelled the power of divine beings, the gods, and manifested them into the physical world.

This was a wholly different concept from using Mana. If healing magic followed the rule of using Mana to stimulate the patient’s body and speed up the natural healing process, then the power of divinity would be more like reverting everything back to how it was through the power of the gods.

In Earth terms, a priest or a cleric simply meant people of cloth serving their chosen deities, but in Berafe, the concept of divinity existed for real. And that meant the strength of divinity within you was used as a yardstick to measure your level of piety.

The ins and outs of how divinity gets manifested still remained a mystery even in a world like Berafe.

Sure, there was this vague understanding that the stronger your piety got, the stronger your own divinity would become, but even then, no one living there could confidently declare that the popes possessed the greatest level of piety among the masses.

Unlike Mana, which you could get more proficient at it, build a bigger reserve of it, and even research it, the whole thing about divinity was pretty simple and extremely random.

Events such as a saintess being discovered in a back alley as far removed from the sacred halls of religious orders, or a young priest in training who joined the order recently, suddenly displaying pope-level divinity happened quite often that there was no need to even mention them.

That was why people had a saying: That the gods were fickle creatures.

They did bless dedicated believers with some amount of divinity, but they would also bestow to an atheist lacking even a trace of faith, with the kind of divinity that easily exceeded those who had walked the path of piety all their lives.

There was one moment in history that such fickleness was at its worst. It involved the most famous Priestess in Berafe’s history.

She served the god of water Buzugote, and wielded a ridiculous amount of divinity that ate regular popes for breakfast; she even went ahead and poured out that divinity like a raging waterfall, as befitting the god she served, whenever the occasion called for it.

The Order of Buzugote rejoiced that they finally found an emissary of god that would take them to a higher acclaim than that of the Order of Latrel. Their followers also cheered on, thinking that the god of water’s name would soon come to dominate the land before long.

If it weren’t for a minor problem, that was. Indeed, it really was a minor matter, not really worthy of a mention. A very, very minor problem.

Well, her ‘race’ was a bit of a problem. Because, she wasn’t a human.

Nope, she was an Elf. That was the title other races took to calling her kind.

From the perspectives of regular Earth humans, there shouldn’t be any problem with an Elf becoming a cleric. Wasn’t it the rule in dime-a-dozen RPGs to make Elves clerics and priests? Wasn’t it a great romance of all hot-blooded males to see a female Elf with long blonde hair casting a healing spell at them?

What, it isn’t?

If it’s not, then never mind. (The author’s inner monologue)

In any case, that was the story for the denizens of the planet Earth. However, such a thing was a bit problematic in Berafe. Actually, make that a massive problem.

Elves were the beings in one with nature. They lived together with trees, ate fruits, didn’t hurt a single animal, and generally lived their lives while trying not to alter the ways of other creatures existing in the world.

However, the divinity was what you’d call a power that went against the nature itself.

It allowed one’s wounds to forcibly heal up instead of letting nature take its course. It made a lifeform exhibit power that exceeded what it originally possessed. And it even reversed the situation where death was the only outcome, and revived the subject to full health.

And then, people conveniently packaged all of that as the naturally-occurring everyday thing in the name of their gods. If the title of ‘divinity’ wasn’t assigned to this power, then even humans would start calling it the devil’s power, instead.

However, Elves were capable of seeing the true nature of things. And they didn’t fall for such a packaging attempt, obviously.

They might have been born originally from the gods, but had eventually went their separate ways and became the people of nature. To them, one of their own possessing the power to go against nature itself was a target for hatred, never mind scorn, and eventually, they ‘politely’ requested the Order of Buzugote to hand the job of her protection over to them.

The Order found themselves in a big dilemma as they were now under pressure of potentially going to war with Elves, but then, the woman in question volunteered to go back to her Elf brethren, leaving them with not much choice but to let her go.

That happened several hundred years ago. No one knew what happened to her since then.

....That was what Yi Ji-Hyuk thought until now, but this....

Seeing that very person stepping out of the Gate, he could only grasp the back of his neck.

“GOD D*MN IT!!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

His eyes caught the sight of an Elf with a head of brilliant silver hair. That water-coloured priest garb proved to be a perfect match for her Elvish figure, too.

“It’s been a long time, oh the Bringer of Apocalypse.” (?)

“Hey, you insane lizard woman?!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

Yi Ji-Hyuk yelled out at the top of his lungs.

“I’m already half dead trying to deal with an insane lizard by my side, but then, you bring along yet another lunatic over here?! What’s this, birds of a feather flocking together?!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

Choi Jung-Hoon’s dazed eyes landed on Yi Ji-Hyuk.

A lunatic?

You mean, that woman? (Choi Jung-Hoon’s inner monologue)

“There’s just no way.....” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

It was truly an amazing feat to say something like that after taking one look at that mysterious woman’s face.

How should he go about describing that face....?

Should he say that her face seemed to contain all of the benevolence and unfathomable mysteriousness found in this world?

She certainly held a different sort of a charm compared to Affeldrichae’s blinding gorgeousness.

Choi Jung-Hoon had seen a lot of good-looking people in his life so he wouldn’t necessarily go “Holy cow!” from her looks alone, but well, there was this unexplainable sense of comfort and gentleness in her that those good-looking people didn’t possess.

If he were to talk about his preference, then he’d definitely choose her over Affeldrichae, even. But now, what was Yi Ji-Hyuk calling her??

A lunatic?!

Triggered by something hard to explain, Choi Jung-Hoon ended up shouting out as well.

“What do you mean, a lunatic? Aren’t you going a bit overboard here?” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

Swish!

Yi Ji-Hyuk’s eyes filled to the brim with annoyance was directed in Choi Jung-Hoon’s direction. The latter flinched, and quite unlike how valiant he sounded earlier, he quickly averted his gaze.

“Mister Choi Jung-Hoon?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Ah, yes.” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

“Let’s say you went out on a road. No, let’s say that you went on a picnic to a mountainside. Okay?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“....Okay?” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

“And then, pow! You run into a huge wild boar. It’s a really huge-a*s boar, you know?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“That sounds scary.” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

“But then, a rabbit passing by suddenly jumps in and rips the boar’s throat wide open to drink its blood, and go ‘Kyahahaha~!’ and then, and then, start chowing down on the meat. How would you feel after seeing all that?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“....I guess I’d feel a dynamic range of emotions.” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

Indeed, it’d be very dynamic.

“So, like, what kind of a rabbit do you think that rabbit is?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“....A Battle Bunny?” (Choi Jung-Hoon) (TL note at the end)

“Are you mad?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“...I can’t deny that. For now.” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

Yi Ji-Hyuk slowly nodded his head.

“That woman’s exactly like that, you know!! That woman! She’s a loon of an Elf, I’ll have you know!! She’s an Elf, so she should just stick to casting magic and shooting arrows like every other Elf, so why the f*ck is she messing around with divine powers?!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Well, uh, I think divine powers sound quite fitting for an Elf, though...?” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

Wait, now that it’s been mentioned, she’s an Elf, huh?

With those pointy ears sticking out from side of her head, yeah, I can totally see it now.

Huh. I get to see a real Elf in my life, too.

Yup, she’s not a human, but a real Elf, alright.

I should stop calling good-looking people “Elven” from now on....

What a shocking difference in quality!! Seriously! (Choi Jung-Hoon’s inner monologue)

“What do you mean, fitting for an Elf?! You’re one of those people who’d look at an Elf shoving down a plate of medium rare steak and still go ‘Ahaha, you eat well like an Elf’!!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“....Well, that’s a bit of an exaggeration.” (Choi Jung-Hoon)

I mean, I wouldn’t go that far, you know!

“Exaggeration, my foot!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

Yi Ji-Hyuk glared briefly at Choi Jung-Hoon and shifted his arrows to Affeldrichae, instead.

“And you. Don’t you know that this woman is insane?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Of course I do.” (Affeldrichae)

“Then, why did you bring an insane loon over here?!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“What were you expecting me to do? I can only bring one person over, and there was no one else capable of solving this issue other than her.” (Affeldrichae)

“What about that Dioreh fella?! What was he doing?? Did he say he won’t come because of me?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“He’s dead.” (Affeldrichae)

“....Oh. I didn’t even know that, and I foolishly.....” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

Yi Ji-Hyuk was about to fall into a melancholic reminiscence of the past, before hurriedly shaking his head.

‘Hold up! Why am I feeling melancholic over Dioreh the First dying?!’ (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Well, good riddance to that geezer! Wait, why did he die, anyway?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“He died of old age, apparently. It’s been a hundred years on that side already.” (Affeldrichae)

“....Curse this time scale difference....” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

Yup, I was really stuck in a seriously scary place, wasn’t I?

But then again, that’s why only five years passed by on this side even though I spent so much time over there. It’s a relief, in a way, but.... (Yi Ji-Hyuk’s inner monologue)

“Okay, whatever. Even then, this is too much. Just why did it have to be this loon.....?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

Yi Ji-Hyuk’s crumpled expression now faced the Elf woman.

Everything about her, from her water-coloured priest garb to her silver waist-length hair, and even those crystal clear eyes.... From top to bottom, he detested it. He just couldn’t stand it.

“Have you been well?” (?)

“I’d have, if it weren’t for you.” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“It really has been a long, long time.” (?)

“Riiight. This is the first time since you nearly broke me in half with that ‘Aqua Buster’ you threw my way. So yeah, it’s been a long time. I thought you died already. What a pity that you’re still alive and kicking.” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Taking the life of another goes against the nature of Elves, after all. So I was being confined for a while, that’s all.” (?)

“Ohh, is it? That means you gotta solve this problem real sharpish and go back, right? Treat it as going on a short holiday overseas, so quickly and cheaply deal with this mess, and then, go back to your confinement, okay?”

“That is indeed the correct path to take, but I believe it’s going to be far too difficult now. My kin has expelled me as I was leaving, you see.” (?)

“................”

Yi Ji-Hyuk roughly scratched the side of his head.

“Nonono, it’s gonna be fine! They will surely accept you back! Elves are generous like that, right?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“You know as well as I do that’s not the case, yes?” (?)

“....Yeah.” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

He knew better than anyone that Elves were utterly inflexible, incredibly old-fashioned, and devoid of any meaningful thoughts in their heads.

....Saying that you can’t eat other lifeforms?

What a bunch of loons. If you wanna quibble over it, then you lot are basically waiting around for lifeforms to grow up sufficiently enough so you can clip their fingers off and gnaw on them for eternity!

Aren’t plants lifeforms now?!

I should’ve set that forest of Elves on fire! Only way for these loons to wake the hell up!

Argh.... I told myself to do that before coming here, but I forgot.

I meant to rename the Elf forest as Yi Ji-Hyuk Plains and level it flat before heading off to Terra Latrel, but oh well..... (Yi Ji-Hyuk’s inner monologue)

“Normally, you’d genuinely feel happy to see someone after a few hundred years, but man, I really can’t stand you.” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Our past is certainly not a simple one, after all. I was only carrying out my duty. Please forgive me for what happened back then.” (?)

“Your duty, my foot!” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

This happened some time before Yi Ji-Hyuk was labelled as the Bringer of Apocalypse.

Back when he was still just a fledgling Dark Wizard, he got driven into a corner by the religious orders going on a Dark Wizard hunting frenzy. Back then... the person standing in the very front chasing after him with everything she had was this very woman.

He started off from the very bottom, rolled around in the mud and struggled really hard, before crawling his way up higher until eventually, he began garnering the attention of the continent as the true immortal – which led to him encountering all sorts of misfortune.

He eventually figured out that, instead of his own Mana, he could rely on an endless supply of it through signing a contract, and officially changed his class to that of a Dark Wizard. But, before he even had a chance to properly learn something, this lunatic of a b*tch poured down a tidal wave of divinity on him and completely obliterated him multiple times in the process.

If it weren’t for his immortality buff, he’d been holding his funeral that day for good. He experienced ‘death’ over a dozen times that day, after all.

He already disliked her because of that, but to make matters worse, she was a cleric, as well.

A dang cleric!

Yi Ji-Hyuk’s natural enemy!

Dark Mana was a power that opposed divinity, so in the end, he got strong enough to reverse the situation and swept all his enemies away like flames evaporating water. But the thing was, when similar amounts of divinity and Dark Mana collided, logic dictated that the latter would definitely come out much worse for wear.

I mean, I instinctively feel repulsed, man! It’s a primal instinct!!

So why did you have to go and fetch this d*mn woman?! (Yi Ji-Hyuk’s inner monologue)

He shuddered in a barely-contained rage and glared at Affeldrichae, prompting her to form somewhat of a mysterious grin.

“....Didn’t you have any other choice?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“No, I didn’t.” (Affeldrichae)

“You ain’t lying to me right now, right?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Oh my goodness! I told you that Dragons can’t lie. How many times do I have to repeat myself?” (Affeldrichae)

“Sure, you may be telling the truth, but I reaaaally hope that you ain’t holding something back and therefore are trying to pull a fast one over my eyes.” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Lala~ la~.” (Affeldrichae)

This dang rotten lizard woman?!

There’s not one trustworthy person – no, hang on, a ‘different race’ in this world, and sure enough, she ends up causing a massive headache! (Yi Ji-Hyuk’s inner monologue)

Yi Ji-Hyuk spat out a grand sigh and shifted his gaze over to the Elf.

“Hey, uhm, what was your name again?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

The silver-haired Elf smiled brightly and replied.

“Have you forgotten it already? But I remember the names you called me very well, though.” (?)

“You do?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“Yes. All those nostalgic names you called me with. Such as, ‘Despicable woman, I’ll kill you’, and ‘If I ever see you again, Imma strip you buck naked, dangle you upside down and start whipping you real good’. Things like that.” (?)

“....Did I really say that?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

.....Oh. I guess she’s still really mad about them, then. Real mad.

Hold on, before all that.... Didn’t I become a trash the moment I said, ‘strip you buck naked’? (Yi Ji-Hyuk’s inner monologue)

As Yi Ji-Hyuk began stewing in despair, the Elf woman formed a refreshing grin aimed at him and spoke up.

“Roabell. That’s my name that you have forgotten.”

“Roabell. Right, Roabell, is it.....” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

“And also, it seems like you have forgotten about something else as well......” (Roabell)

“Eh?” (Yi Ji-Hyuk)

It was then, a humongous amount of divinity suddenly began gushing out like a pool of water from both of Roabell’s hands.

“If it’s a Dark Wizard, then eradication is in order, you see!!!” (Roabell)

Yi Ji-Hyuk could only spit out a helpless groan as the divinity flew towards him.

See, I told you.

This woman is a total nutcase.

Am I wrong? Ah?

Hah.....

< 179. If it’s a Dark Wizard, then eradication is in order! -4 > Fin.

(TL: Okay, This “Battle Bunny” reference doesn’t have anything to do the children’s book “Battle Bunny” by the authors Jon Scieszka and Mac Barnett. Nor is it a reference to a Japanese Manga series called “Battle Rabbits.” Nope, in order to get a clear picture of where the author is going with this, google: “?? ??”. You can thank me later.)